![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Sep. 14th, 2015 04:12 pmWelcome to Mars.
One man brings fear to robots and aliens, and hope to the humans who make this frontier planet their home; that man is currently engaged in his favorite pastime: Marshal paperwork.
(tap, tap, tap)
"Marshal Files for the Mars-Earth Coalition Records...
"Possibility of a blob infestation in town. First reared its head... Wait, no. Do blobs have heads?"
Sparks Nevada, Marshal on Mars, is not a man afraid of the backspace key.
"...First blob presented itself at the landing pad, the next spotted at Clover's Casket and Coffin. Alerted right away, blasted first with laser pistol, which... so gross. Lassoed second and followed standard miscellaneous blob removal procedure TAH dash two hundred aaaaaaand twenty. Minimal civilian impact."
(tap, tap, tap)
"End Marshal Files. Save... and... send."
(swoosh)
Sparks Nevada sits back in his chair and looks up at the ceiling of the Marshal Station. Next he glances in the direction of the artillery room. He should probably see about oiling those exo-suits.
Instead, he shakes his head and lets out a cheery chuckle.
"Yeah, no. You know what? Computer! Call back that file. That there paperwork was so much fun the first time, how about we do it again."
"Retrieving file," the computer intones. "Message Recall notice sent. Received. Ignored. Your file was opened anyway."
Sparks feels himself deflate ever so slightly.
It passes.
"That's okay," he decides. "I'll just re-do it and send it on with a retraction notice. That'll work." He laughs to himself. "Of course it will.
"I'm... from Earth."
One man brings fear to robots and aliens, and hope to the humans who make this frontier planet their home; that man is currently engaged in his favorite pastime: Marshal paperwork.
(tap, tap, tap)
"Marshal Files for the Mars-Earth Coalition Records...
"Possibility of a blob infestation in town. First reared its head... Wait, no. Do blobs have heads?"
Sparks Nevada, Marshal on Mars, is not a man afraid of the backspace key.
"...First blob presented itself at the landing pad, the next spotted at Clover's Casket and Coffin. Alerted right away, blasted first with laser pistol, which... so gross. Lassoed second and followed standard miscellaneous blob removal procedure TAH dash two hundred aaaaaaand twenty. Minimal civilian impact."
(tap, tap, tap)
"End Marshal Files. Save... and... send."
(swoosh)
Sparks Nevada sits back in his chair and looks up at the ceiling of the Marshal Station. Next he glances in the direction of the artillery room. He should probably see about oiling those exo-suits.
Instead, he shakes his head and lets out a cheery chuckle.
"Yeah, no. You know what? Computer! Call back that file. That there paperwork was so much fun the first time, how about we do it again."
"Retrieving file," the computer intones. "Message Recall notice sent. Received. Ignored. Your file was opened anyway."
Sparks feels himself deflate ever so slightly.
It passes.
"That's okay," he decides. "I'll just re-do it and send it on with a retraction notice. That'll work." He laughs to himself. "Of course it will.
"I'm... from Earth."
Pre-Milliways...
Aug. 26th, 2015 07:25 pmAnd young 'uns need a' saving
On my rocket steed I race across the stars
For I've sworn by the burrs of my astro spurs
to right the outlaw wrongs on Mars
(Yes he rights the outlaw wrongs on Mars!)
Oh the hypercattle's humming
And the Marjun's savage drumming
Are as beautiful as comet bugs in jars
Oh I'm from Earth!
But I right the outlaw wrongs on Mars
(Yes he rights the outlaw wrongs on Mars!)
On the plains of the red planet I uphold the law
And I do it with a pair of robot fists
(POW!)
Evil extermination I have faced
For my robot rogues they hardly ever miss!
(Hardly ever miss!)
And I reckon I'll be riding
In the name of truth and justice
For as long as I can count the shooting stars
For I've sworn by the burrs of my astro spurs
To right the outlaw wrongs on Mars
(Yes he rights the outlaw wrongs on Mars!)
And I'm from Earth!*
*The Sparks Nevada Theme Song is by Eban Schletter.
